It's no easy feat living with a teenage peacock. No easier than it was living with the toddler version. Or the young child version. Or really any that I have encountered. 15 years of living with a peacock and I am still as baffled as I was on day one. With the wide array of beautiful colors and amazing patterns, each peacock varies in its appearance. Similar variations of emotions and personalities come as a package deal. With time, and seasons, and changes, the peacock settles into a pattern and life can seemingly become more predictable. Until it isn't. Until it doesn't make sense again. Until the prayers for wisdom begin again.
Inevitably, peacocks are not as common as chickens. As wonderful as chickens can be, when they become teenagers, they too can change. Where as before, the chickens accepted the peacock, now it is no longer cool to spread colorful feathers. It is no longer acceptable to leap and play and nuzzle. "Your feathers are so big." "You take up so much room." "Why does your tail stick out like that?" Never waiting for the answer because the question was never really meant to be answered. It was meant to be talked about in hushed whispers while walking away. Extreme colors and larger than life differences matter. They shouldn't. But they do. A peacocks worth can get blurred with comments that aren't exactly hurtful but still hurt. A peacock can forget that their worth is in the very differences that make them the unique life created for a purpose. A peacock can still wish on days that it was a chicken. Or at least that it wasn't the only peacock. Or that at least that chickens would care there even was a peacock. Chickens can forget that they are unique even in the midst of looking like the others. Chickens can quickly get comfortable in the brood and content in the sameness of other chickens. It's when chickens care that there are chickens. And that there are peacocks. And care that there are both. It's when peacocks care that they stick out. When they care that what makes them different seems very different. Peacocks can get tired of being around peacocks just a quickly as a chicken can often get tired of being around chickens. Peacocks can hang out with chickens and the chicken will usually have the best time. It's when the chicken realizes that other chickens are watching. And they care that chickens are watching. "Go be a peacock somewhere else." Or better yet, "Can you just NOT be a peacock right now?" Shame. Embarrassment. Loneliness. Trying to tuck feathers in. Trying to not be so colorful. Trying to not be noticed.
But the peacock was meant to stand out. The peacock is meant to be different. The peacock brings color to the picture. The peacock brings new out of same. The chicken was created for a different purpose. That's great! More than one life with more than one purpose. It makes the world go round. It gives people a moment to be daring. To dance. To laugh. To make a face. To change a voice. To twirl. To skip. To be. Just to be. BE different. BE unique. BE ready for each moment. BE free. BE significant. BE cherished. There's comfort in knowing you are different than me. There's comfort in knowing I can enjoy your different. But when do we learn that? When do peacocks learn that? When do chickens learn that?
Why try to fit in when you were born to stand out?
Go be a peacock, Lil.
But be the best one the world has ever seen.
I love you.
