My Green Eyes
And so it went....
We had too much fun with one another not to hang out and it always seemed we had schedules perfectly timed to fit in a lunch at the MSC or do laundry at the Jot 59 or Wild and Wooly Wednesdays at Double Dave's Pizza. I still thought of him as a friend and I so enjoyed hanging out with him. He was funny, interesting, and it never felt awkward to be with him. We liked so many of the same things and we had become such good friends.
Throughout those first weeks, I was really digging into student life at Texas A&M and had no trouble being by myself now. Now it was a choice to go and do rather than being by myself because I had no choice. I had groups of friends from Fish Camp and groups of friends from my sorority and groups of friends from my dorm. It was how I always pictured college life. I was not interested in dating although a guy had caught my eye from my Fish Camp. His name was Grey. He would stop by my dorm window to chat if it was open or would walk me to class a few times. It always seemed strange, forced, and the conversation was hard. I always was relieved when Patrick came around or asked me to games. Our friendship was so very easy. I liked being with him and it felt right.
I remember Patrick's very first compliment to me. Our conversations were usually not too serious and we always joked with one another. I would learn very quickly that Patrick didn't give out compliments just to give them out. He did not try to flatter with his words and he means what he says. He is not a man of a huge amount of words but you know exactly how he feels. He has a hard time hiding what his face reveals. We were deep in conversation when out of the blue, he stopped and said, "I love your beautiful blue eyes." Nothing romantic, just stating a fact. In our not-giving-an-inch usual way, I stated a fact back, "They're green." Without missing a beat, without an apology, without him being embarassed he replies in the same tone, "I love your beautiful green eyes." His smile says it all; he's funny. Still is.
It wasn't until I realized others thought he was funny, did it start to change how I felt about my "friend." I was never truly a jealous person. I never really cared about anyone in a way that I would be jealous. I have green eyes, but I'm not a green person. Wasn't a green person.
I knew Patrick's schedule on certain days because we were always meeting to eat lunch, study, or head off campus. One day, close to where I knew his next class was, I decided to cut him off and say hello. I still rememer it was in G. Rollie White Stadium, second floor, top of the side stairs. I was a little early, knew he wouldn't be surprised although he wouldn't be expecting me, climbed the stairs and waited outside his classroom for a quick hello. It didn't take long until students began coming up the stairwell and filing into the classroom. Student after student but no Patrick. Thinking maybe he was not going to class for some reason, I began to gather my backpack and things from the floor and I heard voices. I continued to gather my stuff and listened as the voices got closer. Then there was giggling. Talking, but lots of giggling. The voices were muted through the stairwell, but there was no mistaking the voice. Patrick was coming up those stairs. But so was the girl attached to the giggling voice. Whatever he had said, she thought it to be the funniest thing ever. They topped the stairs and he immediately caught my eye. Not a second glance back, he smiled and headed my way. The girl, obviously disappointed, said something about seeing him in class....with a quick nonchalant wave, his eyes were on mine. And that smile, I had grown to love.
I'm not really sure what happened that day. But it changed. I knew he was funny. I realized now, others knew he was funny too. I didn't like her knowing he was funny. I didn't like him being funny with her now that I think about it. This was my bud, my friend, my hang out guy.... My green eyes were suddenly greener than they had been.